For the first time in my life, I do not have to GO somewhere. My job is to stay home. Yes, taking care of a baby is work. Instead of planning lessons, I change diapers. I no longer stay at school late to grade papers. Now I sing "Old MacDonald Had a Farm" ten times a day to keep my baby happy. Taking care of Titus is so rewarding and just as draining as teaching. To those of you who work full time outside your home and then come home to your job as mom, you are amazing!
Being a stay at home mom can be lonely, especially when living overseas. The expat community is not large. Connections and "friendships" I once had while working have been severed because I did not return to teach. While unintentional, it does not make things any easier. To understand a little better, I came up with an analogy. Life here is like living in a snow globe. It is a small, close knit community. We often refer to the community as a "bubble." After being inside the bubble for four years, I have now been removed. I am standing outside, staring into the snow globe. It feels as though I am no longer a part of the community. Instead, I am an onlooker.
Work keeps people busy. Sometimes, extremely busy. I completely understand, as I once worked (outside my home) too. :) However, people often take for granted the short conversations they have with people in passing at work. I did not realize how important they were until I stopped teaching.
What also makes being a stay at home mom challenging overseas is the rapidly changing expat community. People come and go here often. To make a good friend takes time. It also takes effort. However, sometimes these things are lacking in an environment that is always changing.
This is what I know: I am never alone. First, Jesus is always with me. When I start feeling down about friendships, or lack thereof, I need to remember that I am never alone. Next, I need to count it as "pure joy." I will admit, I have not been able to count this as joy very often. In James 1 it tells us to, "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so you can be mature and complete, not lacking anything."
I will leave you with this: doing hard things is often not easy. However, hard things usually end up being the most rewarding things. Perhaps this mindset will allow me to "count it as joy" more often. :)
